We finish up our California vacation and head back home. Once home I am confident that being back here will help him to realize all that he has. Our family, home, dog. All of the things he misses being away. If he can just touch reality, then everything can go back to normal.
And it seemed to do just that for the week that he was home. We talked about the things that were going on with his life in the military. The medical problems and her. We were pretty open and honest. We spent time together but I must admit I was VERY clingy at this time. I was not myself at all. I was afraid to let him out of my sight. I was terrified of it. All because of that damn cell phone.
He kept his cell phone on serious lockdown. It was hidden from my view day and night. I think he slept with it under his pillow. And *that* made me crazy. A classic sign that things were not as easy breezy as I wanted them to be. He insisted that he was not talking to her in any way, not voice, email or text. But he was like Houdini with that phone. It stayed disappeared. And the more it did the more paranoid I became.
We finally had the "talk" right before he had left. We hashed out his feelings, hashed out my feelings. Talked about why I felt like I had to stalk him. Talked about that fucking phone. Everything came out that night and I felt so much better.
He told me that everything was going to be alright. He told me that he was going to retire and come home and we were going to work it all out. He told me that I didn't have anything to worry about when he went back to his duty station. He was going to end it, even though he also insisted that nothing had ever gotten started.
Whew. That was a close one! I knew it. A week at home was all he needed.
Right?
See you here again soon.
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